These are crazy things my mother has told me this week. I find it harder and harder to kindly listen to such crazy things and these are just a few of the wonderful gems I have heard this week alone. I want to break these down to truly highlight the absurdity.
1) She believes that if your heart goes into shock and EMS has to "shock" you that the jolt will trigger your cancer to spread. Of course this isn't true but what if it was? I think I would still want to be shocked because if I'm not then I'm dead anyway. It makes no sense to worry about a life saving procedure possibly causing you problems later. If you forgo it, you're dead.
2) If you get lapband surgery, you can't have soda anymore because the gases will cause the bands to burst. I looked it up. Carbonated beverages can cause the pouch to distend and cause discomfort, period. No explosions. However, I find the better question to be, Why get lapband surgery if you plan to continue drinking soda? The whole point of the surgery is to lose weight. If you are opposed to the surgery because you can't give up soda and don't want your stomach to explode, why go thru with it in the first place?
3) If you don't vacuum your floors, social services will come in and take you away. Really? I think they are more worried about filth and hoards of stuff. If you cant see your floor to vacuum it, then maybe you have a problem. I think cat hair on a carpet is the least of social services worries.
Anyway I hope you got a giggle reading this because it was really hard to bite my tongue and listen to it the first time. Luckily for me, I am not a cancer patient, do not need lapband surgery, and do not have carpeted floors.
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